My Chiropractor adjusted my back and my idea of boundaries.
15 Aug 2021
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When I first understood I had issues with boundaries it was at the chiropractic office. I had a massage the day before and I could barely get off the table. I had never had such back pain in my life. I got into a chiropractor close to me the next day and I barely made it inside the office.
He did whatever he does and low and behold I walked right out that day full of gratitude, I was still a bit sore for a few days but he definitely fixed me up and became my go-to chiro! He spent a lot of time at first asking questions and just listening.
One visit he was talking to me about one of my issues and describing the body and the way it works. As he's talking, I heard the little doorbell ring meaning another client was there. I immediately realized I had been there quite a while. He kept on talking and explaining and I started feeling uncomfortable knowing that someone was waiting for their appt and I know that he had given me a lot of his time already.
I almost couldn't hear what he was saying anymore and I was getting anxious and I remember saying something to the Dr. like "Thank you for all your help. I think someone is waiting, maybe I'm taking too much of your time."
I'll never forget his dead-eye stare right into my soul and said so clearly. "Tara, I have great boundaries. This is my business and I know how long I need to be with each patient. You don't get to decide that. That is up to me. I need you to work on your boundaries. I believe that your lack of boundaries, especially at work is a big reason why you need to visit me so much."
Reflection: As harsh as that sounded at the time, it was the truth. Also, look at how I was trying to shrink myself to make room for the other patient. They deserved the time, not me. Look how uncomfortable I was taking up space. How rude of me to take up space. I keep thinking about these things, these reflections, and as I do I share. Maybe someone else can use them, and if not it will go into the recesses of the FB diary so that I can look back one day and see how far I've actually come.
#foreverastudent #growth #selflove2021 #LoveGlassesRevolution
He did whatever he does and low and behold I walked right out that day full of gratitude, I was still a bit sore for a few days but he definitely fixed me up and became my go-to chiro! He spent a lot of time at first asking questions and just listening.
One visit he was talking to me about one of my issues and describing the body and the way it works. As he's talking, I heard the little doorbell ring meaning another client was there. I immediately realized I had been there quite a while. He kept on talking and explaining and I started feeling uncomfortable knowing that someone was waiting for their appt and I know that he had given me a lot of his time already.
I almost couldn't hear what he was saying anymore and I was getting anxious and I remember saying something to the Dr. like "Thank you for all your help. I think someone is waiting, maybe I'm taking too much of your time."
I'll never forget his dead-eye stare right into my soul and said so clearly. "Tara, I have great boundaries. This is my business and I know how long I need to be with each patient. You don't get to decide that. That is up to me. I need you to work on your boundaries. I believe that your lack of boundaries, especially at work is a big reason why you need to visit me so much."
Reflection: As harsh as that sounded at the time, it was the truth. Also, look at how I was trying to shrink myself to make room for the other patient. They deserved the time, not me. Look how uncomfortable I was taking up space. How rude of me to take up space. I keep thinking about these things, these reflections, and as I do I share. Maybe someone else can use them, and if not it will go into the recesses of the FB diary so that I can look back one day and see how far I've actually come.
#foreverastudent #growth #selflove2021 #LoveGlassesRevolution
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